Thursday, November 08, 2007

What's that saying? If you're in a hole... stop digging?

Today is my lucky day. I get to combine two of my favorite pastimes: Politics and cycling. I find the clip below absolutely hilarious.

Now to put all my cards on the table, I am neither a republican nor a democrat. In my opinion they are essentially the same party with minor variations around the edges and the fact that it is next to impossible to get a third party into US federal politics is a crying shame.

If I was forced to pigeonhole myself I would probably say that I fall pretty close to anarcho-syndicalism. Just not a big fan of so few people making so many important decisions that affect so many. Also, the other sad fact is, while I love politics, I can't vote. I'm Canadian.

Yes, I am a member of the secret cabal that pulls the strings of cultural power (What? Canadians? Yes. I merely point you toward people and shows such as: John Candy, The Kids in the Hall, Car Poolers, Jim Carrey, Peter Jennings, SNL, William Gibson - the orginator of the term cyberspace [although to be fair he's originally from the US but his ground breaking novel neuromancer was conceived and written in Canada]. I could go on but I think I've made my point.

Now I also have to fess up and take some responsibility for the "gentleman from North Carolina". He does represent my adopted state and I obviously let this guy through the cracks. I should have been more vigilant. He truely is an embarrassment to the state and for that I apologize. Clearly he's been hitting the moonshine a little hard lately and does not have all his faculties together in one spot. The one he's using during this speech is apparently the "I can speak with no logic" faculty. A rarely used faculty but an important one- especially at drunken frat parties. All the words and sentences may be grammatically correct (tho' I am being generous here) but they make no sense. I think he might actually have Wernicke's aphasia.

Watch the clip and I'll actually write about cycling next.

Hmmm. Let's see. If I'm hearing Mr. McHenry correctly, cycling not only does not help the world's energy crisis and does nothing to alleviate global warming but, by choosing to bike to work instead on driving, it actually may send us down the path of global catastrophe by encouraging people to not buy cars, use public transit and reorganize society into self-sustaining units - bad for corporations, bad for America. Those darn crazy democrats. Little did I realize that the vast majority of the population of the world was actually deliberately harming American interests but using pedal power instead of "gas guzzling " (cliche I know) American made SUVs.

WAR I say! WAR! We must stop the war on terror and fight the real enemy... CYCLISTS!

Oh, by the way, in case you are a fan of Mr. McHenry or his ilk, this is my sad and sorry attempt at sarcasm and wit. I do not claim that is of the caliber of Johnathon Swift but with the decline of education in recent decades this may be the best I can do.

Keep pumping

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